My Brother Vineet ....

As a child always wondered why do i need a brother ( esp. an elder one) ...who bullies,bosses & wacks - What the hell ! Do we deserve this for just being young?

As u enter your teens you kinda understand from where that arrogance steps in...when you are able to communicate & pick the moves to get friendly to the opposite sex..learn the golden rules of dating from an evolved hunter..takes this love-hate relationship to a new level & then u say -Thank god i have a brother...Its also the same guy who clears all the teeny popper messes u land up in the Wonder Years! Ones perspective changes overnite & opens a whole new world of bonding...which keeps getting stronger over the years till you become pillars of support to each other in years to come...

Well I too was blessed with the love & hate relation of one such a great brother who touched my life for 17 years...A good son, a great friend, a good boyfriend & most of all a good human being who touched lives of so many people at such a young age that his vacum is still felt. But the irony of life as one says we spent most of our lives fighting & when time came to actually be able to hit it off - it ended too soon..Well purely endorsing " Make hay when the sun shines".

I still remember a very funny episode - i was in my early teens trying to hook with a young girl & in my enthusiasm promised to take to a Disco( at the age of 14 !!) & guess what was compelled to go to Vineet for his help..A little pest that he could be was gifted with a free servant for a week ( That me..who cleaned/ polished his shoes...the works!!!! ) just to DROP ME TO A DISCO & keep this out of our parents. Only on the day when we were all set to leave i realised that brat had already told my folks & kept me on guard for no reason - needless to say have been a laughing stock ever since...Not only was he creative but was exceptionally Witty & emotional.

During those days my dad would constantly travel overseas leaving him to be the eldest man in the house. A caring son that he was knew mum was getting lonely in the evening so he ensured he took her for drives, would pack her favourite Dosa's or just ensure he ended all his late nights to spend time at home so she didn't feel lonely. He could understand & relate to her emotions so easily at an age when he could be busy partying or be engrossed in all other distractions youth could have in store.

I feel like penning down all the memories I have shared with Bhaiya so that age or time doesnt weaken my memories. Its been a decade now & everyone says Time heals ...would say yes time does heal but doesn't eradicate the emptiness a departed loved one leaves behind. It keep you wondering why do certain people come into our lives , embrace it & then leave you carving for more - is this his way of saying ' You deserve it?'.

Does a physical distance mean we have actually lost our karmic connection? If so, why do i still dream abt him? or have visions of his return ? feel his presence every time I need him? Is this cycle of life & birth just restricted to our physical existence or our loved departed ones become our guiding angels? Whatever, it is all i can say is I know he's right here, around us, watching us & most of the times warning us prior to any mishaps in forms of intuitions...

I hope at some point in this cycle of life & death, i get an opportunity to connect with him again just to let him know I missed him....